Drake Starling

2008-09 Outbound to Hungary

Hometown: St. Johns, Florida

School: Bartram Trail High School, St. Johns, Florida

Sponsor: Southpoint Jacksonville Rotary Club, District 6970, Florida

Host: Budapest-City Rotary Club, District 1911, Hungary

Bio

Drake's Bio

“Professing to be wise, they become fools.” – Romans 1:22

Bliss can be found in ignorance like the old saying “Ignorance is Bliss,” but bliss can also be found in wisdom. Therefore, if we are wise, we are blissful, but if we are ignorant we enjoy a close-minded form of bliss which is a transparent form of happiness; in other words we can only be happy with what we see because it’s all that we know.

If we only could step out of our comfort zone and accept that we cannot change some things and use courage to change the things we can, then we become wise, and we remain blissful, but this time without walls and blinders and hindrances we are finally open to the world, then we see that with wisdom we become too blissful, thinking that we know it all, so we attempt to humble ourselves. When we hear people say “Oh, some people just think they know everything,” you think to yourself “That’s how I feel, like I’ve got everything figured out,” so we tell ourselves, or we should tell ourselves that it’s best that we not act like we know it all and that we have everything figured out. However, we tell ourselves this but we do not act upon it, so we continue on believing that we are indeed wiser (and it’s inevitable we all make that mistake) but that’s what makes us fat and happy and eventually those words, thoughts and actions of wisdom become obsolete to us and we fall from our point of nirvana and clarity; and we as livers of life professing to be wise become fools.

I do not want to be a fool, I have no intention of being blissful through ignorance, and as a matter of fact I refuse it. I’m fifteen years old and I’m going to Hungary for an entire year and although you don’t hear that every day I say it just about every day yet it somehow doesn’t lose its zeal. I could tell you all about my hobbies, friends, family and whatever else is usually found in a biography, however I’m telling you this instead because it’s something that will hopefully show you more than “Drake Starling” but his inner thought, so here it goes.

I find myself wanting wisdom, although right now I think I have everything figured out, probably the teenager talking in me, I have enough sense now to know that when I feel that way, it’s just a feeling. I hope - no, I know that this year will make me into something great. For every exchange student I know that he/she will become something great. When we tell people about what we’re doing this year they look at us like we’re crazy and they’re absolutely right, because no normal person would do this, it takes a certain person to do this; and if that’s what qualifies as crazy then so be it, we’re crazy, and I’m proud of it.

I look back at former exchange students and there is something in their eyes that tells us that they are a different type of people, and I see the naivety in our eyes as we embark on this experience and I can’t help but think “Will my eyes tell people that when I get back?” I sure want them too, but I guess that depends on whether or not I want this badly enough, I want this like I’ve never wanted anything before but what’s going to make me blissful is if I step out of my comfort zone and embrace all that this has to offer, even if it is going to be difficult.

No one ever said this was going to be easy, it’s going to be the furthest thing from easy, I have to let go of what I know and love and learn to start all over, a fresh start. That’s an enticing yet scary idea. I’m ready to do this, I’m ready to let go. It will definitely be worth it. Thank you to everyone who has had some role in this; Mom, Rotarians, and all my family for supporting me to do this. I’m ready to let go and begin.

July 30 Journal

All right, I have 25 days left…. 25! When did that happen? Everyone will tell you something that starts off like “It seems like just yesterday I signed up for the program,” they’ll say something about the past and how they prepared for leaving but I want to forget the past, well, not forget it entirely but more like, press the pause button, take the movie out, put in a new one and restart later where I left off.

I haven’t left yet but I already feel changed by this experience, not in its entirety but I feel much more mature than your average junior. Maybe it’s just nerves, but this doesn’t seem as unreal as I thought it would be. I went to the mall today to get some winter clothes for Budapest (I hear it gets cold there hehe) and when my mother was telling the cashier why we needed the clothes, which she always does even if they don’t need to know why, he was gladdened to hear that I wanted to go study overseas, but he asked that one question that I don’t have the right answer to. “Are you fluent in Hungarian?” “UHH…. well, I… a little?” I mean I have studied a lot of Hungarian, and I can hold a minimal conversation with a native speaker, a two year old perhaps, however I don’t want to be minimally fluent. My goal is and has been to be fluent by the time I get there and if I try to and continue attempting then hey! What’s stopping me?

August 26 Journal

All right, here we go. It’s day two for me and I haven’t slept properly since I got on the plane, I’m too excited to be here.

This city is nicknamed “The Paris of the East,” and I can see why. I’d like to talk about the flight but I’m trying to repress some horrible memories, and well…I….it…just wasn’t good, but the airplane food is gone now, far away from me.

I have the top floor of the house all to myself, it has two secret passageways, yeah that’s right SECRET passage ways! It’s almost the size of my house and it’s all mine. Plus it has the best view of the city, every morning I wake up to a sunrise over the mountains of Buda and look down the river at Pest. It’s quite a sight.

My Hungarian has improved a lot since I’ve been here. Today I was listening to a conversation my host sister was having and I finally understood how to say “I have.” Hey! I know that you other outbounds are saying that that’s the easiest verb in any language, but guess what, there is no way to say "I have" in Hungarian, so they have to use several other words. There are at least three ways to say I have, and I just learned them, so ha!

Everyone says my Hungarian is AMAZING. I was so happy when I met my rotary club tonight, and they told me that…. Well, they didn’t have to say too much, their mouths were open the whole time. However, I’m still not satisfied with It so I’ll improve it.

OH, by the way the reason I’m so tired is because last night I opened my windows since it’s so cool outside and I fell asleep and woke up at 2am because I heard a buzzing and it was a moth the size of my hand, and I’m not gonna lie I was a little…”Startled.” So guess who had to battle a 5 inch moth monster at 2am….that’s right me. Now… guess who won. Haha, I think the neighbors must have heard it because it was quite a noise I made, and then today we went around town and everyone and their mother wanted to meet me. So I met everyone and I tried to remember all their names but it wasn’t working.

My host family is extremely hospitable, and just about perfect. I couldn’t ask for a better one. So many things to do, such little time to do them in. HAAAA overload. I start school in a week, so I have to be fluent by then or else. This is the best feeling I’ve ever had. I can’t wait for tomorrow.

A viszontlátásra

August 28 Journal

I know I wrote yesterday but there’s something that I just have to say. Today I read some of the student journals and many of them described the feelings they had before leaving and while they were leaving, and I hate to say names, but Joe…you’re awesome. I liked your journal, it shows more than you let on.

Anyway, when I said goodbye to everyone, it didn’t hurt as much as they said it would, and I just told myself that It was because it hadn’t sunk in yet, but I’m here and I still don’t feel sad, or deeply missing family or friends. I didn’t find myself crying at the airport or when I got off the plane, and I was waiting for the roller coaster of emotions as I reminisced about my memories at home, but still nothing. At this point, I was forcing myself to be sad, but it wasn’t working. I was too excited so I thought I could try it later, and I did but still NOTHING.

OK, that’s a lie. I was a little sad to leave, but not the depression that the Rotex speak of. I think I realize (after 3 short days) that it’s because I know I’ll be back. I know I’ll return, but life back home isn’t going to wait for me. But if I wait for it, then I’ll lose out on life here and there. I can’t hold onto both for now, but I keep on thinking that when I do return home, how great it’s going to be to have both worlds in my hand - such power and knowledge and wisdom I’ll have, and no one will be able to take it away from me.

However if I do fall prey to emotions, which I know I will, then I’ll know it’s because I’m absolutely unique…just like everyone else. Life is good….and it only gets better because we want it to.

September 29 Journal

All right, it’s been a while since my last journal, I know. I write this in my bed, covered in sheets with tissues and medicine everywhere and as I look out my window I see the city, hustling and bustling. People are going on with their lives. I like days like this because then I can reflect back on what I’ve done, and then I learn what I have to do. I went to Lake Balaton, the Hungarian “SEA.” Even though there are puddles in my backyard that are bigger, it’s still a sea to them, I love it. It was supposed to be a getaway tennis tournament weekend for my host father, which it was, but I was planning to go swimming, ping pong tournament, volleyball, go to the beach, bicycle, and everything under the sun, but plans never really work out how I want them to anymore, I was stuck indoors in the hotel, with a cold, and I am still with the same dreaded cold.

OHH! Almost forgot I went to Vienna, it was the best, beautiful, but Budapest is prettier (Don’t tell the Austrians I said that) and I went into the old Hapsburg royal palace, the national museums, and St. Stephen’s church. I swear everything in Hungary and is named after Stephen. St. Stephen’s square, St. Stephen’s hill, St. Stephen’s buildings, streets, shopping centers, OHH the agony!!!!!And then when I thought I was going to get away from it all, NOOOOOO. Everything in Vienna had to be named after Stephen too, and yet no one can pronounce my name properly, life is funny.

Also, I had my 16th birthday here, it was surprising. At first, I thought nothing of it, I almost forgot my own birthday, then I had dinner with my family and started to fall asleep from the carbs, and I thought maybe I should go rest- and then BOOM! The lights went off, the door opened, candles were lit and I came face to face with the most delicious cherry filled, turo (cheese)-cake in the world. The singing began “Boldog Szuletesnapot, Boldog szuletesnapot, boldog szuletesnapot…” etc. It was a good day.

I think the little things in life are what make us the happiest. I was late leaving the house the other day, and the bus was late, I was pinned to the glass window like silly putty, and then I ran to school, ran like my life depended on it. I had three blocks to go in 50 seconds. I barely made it in before they locked the doors, I ran up to my classroom and saw that that door was closed, so class must have started earlier, and even though you’re not supposed to come in to a class after it begins I had to. I knocked, no one answered, I banged no one answered, I said “this isn’t funny in Hungarian” and then the woman next door, came out and said there are no classes today. Just my luck, then I sat down, thought about what I should do and decided I need some fun, so I went deep into Buda, got lost, on purpose, and somehow ended up without even planning to, at fisherman’s bastion in the old city overlooking all of Budapest. Things were coming my way. I went to the mall, and then I did a double take at the large group of students headed my way, it was my class. They were coming to the dentist. Here, no one goes by themselves to the dentist, only in school groups, strange. Of course, NO ONE told me about it, so I got on the bus, and went to Pest to meet the other exchange students for our weekly meeting, where we try to teach each other Hungarian and told them how my day went, oh and I was hit by an old lady’s purse on the subway, long story it was her fault…….. mostly.

On another note, my host family is nothing short of perfect. I’m starting to grow to love them, I don’t know what I’m going to do when I have to leave them, I hope that day never comes. They do everything to make me feel comfortable or happy.

 

Arrival	In Vienna at St. Stephen's Church	Hapsburg Royal Palace	My great host dad on TV
My house	Me, myself, and Buda	Surprise shot	Buda view from Pest
Royal Palace in Buda	Holocaust Memorial on the Danube River	Chain Bridge	The bazilika and I
Sari, Kata, and I	First day of school	In Vienna

November 15 Journal

I understand now why babies can’t talk for the first two years of their life, it’s because they’re so tired from learning the language. Everyone says, “You’re such an adult for doing this,” but usually they never finish that conversation with me because I have to go take my daily nap (yes I take a daily nap.) I think it’s the only way I’d survive here.

I’ve decided to start doing my journals a certain way. First, in every journal, I will describe the native culture. Second, I will describe the happenings and on-goings of my life. So lucky for you, you get the best of both worlds. Now I will begin.

I think I’m getting better at school. The language is getting easier everyday, but some days I’m on the ball and other days I can’t even find the ball. The teachers are more than helpful to me in my language learning. The students are nice people. However, they're not perfect. I try to pick my friends carefully, because I think I have to here (there’s no telling what natives can get an exchange student to do if they’re bad apples.) School is probably the cleanest place in the city. Budapest could use a few renovations. Nonetheless, it’s beautiful.

However, since Budapest is so dirty, my Rotary club here has suggested a project called, “Szeretem Budapestet” Which means, “I love Budapest.” So the other local exchange students and I have decided to get involved in it. What it entails is going around the city, picking up garbage, and trash and painting over graffiti in the city. As exchange students, most of us really don’t think that we can make a change (whether it’s in our host country, community, or even back home.)

Sadly, most of us think that we’re just here to have fun and stay on vacation for a year. I don’t want to vacation here for a year. I want to live here for a year. Become a native, make my own opinions about the political happenings, and understand the history to learn why the present is the way it is, and then predict and hope for what the future may hold for the Hungarian people. I want to feel Hungarian. Just like I feel American. So I think the language is becoming less of a challenge for me. I'm so happy. It feels like I've been holding my breath since I've arrived, waiting to exhale, and I don't think I can yet, but the pressure is definitely starting to release. It's a really good feeling. I’ve been finding myself thinking in Hungarian lately, without even realizing it, I’m understanding so much more. I never thought this period would actually come to pass. It’s like my brain is clicking and the sparks are flying everywhere but then the ohhh so sudden meltdown comes and I feel like a blob of gelatin. I can’t make out a sentence, I lose my senses. All you want to do is sleep and then you wake up more tired than before.

Luckily for me, every morning I wake up to a great host family, good food, warm house and more good food. It’s actually quite funny and I’ve noticed this of many Hungarians. When I come downstairs for dinner and my family tells me, “Please, have something to eat,” and they go through the entire list of items in the fridge or pantry that I could eat, which is the best, who cooked it and for what special occasion. I’m telling you I know that fridge like the back of my hand. I have to stop them somewhere and say “No thank you, I’m not hungry,” then I usually get the reply, “Ok, in that case, you should try the cherry and cottage cheese pancake.” So I usually end up eating the pancake anyway. I can honestly say every day I am stuffed to the rim.

On habits, Hungarians have unique habits, that most of the time make me laugh out loud. First of all, even if there are no cars for miles around and the red “do not walk” sign is lit then they still don’t cross the road. My logic is if there are no vehicles coming then I can cross, but when I do people look at me like I’m crazy, and say things like “You can’t do that.” I usually reply “Is it illegal?” “Well, no but-“ “Is it rude, or low-class?” “No, but-“ “But what?” “We just never thought of it before” “Well, we learn something new every day. Don’t we?” Ok, it didn’t go exactly like that, I’m not rude to the natives Al, I promise.

School. School here is solely an academic place, there are no clubs, no after school activities, or anything of the sort. However, since my school is a special athletic school everyone has a sport to do after school. It could be anything from synchronized swimming to hand ball or soccer to Olympic gymnastics. That’s right I have some Olympians attending my school. As a matter of fact my school was named after a Hungarian Olympian. Csik Ferenc, maybe you’ve heard of him…….or not. Anyway, I’m making friends faster than I thought. Last night I went to a birthday party that everyone invited me to and it was great, I think it was the first time the words were coming out of my mouth without me hesitating or thinking about them beforehand, that’s when I realized I was thinking in Hungarian. However, I’ve never had such a bad headache in my life, I actually had to go home early because my head was hurting so badly, I never thought it was possible to feel that much pain in your head. I’m probably exaggerating but it hurt a lot. Oh! And, since I have no name equivalent in Hungarian, my friends gave me a Hungarian name. Listen to this, since I’m always tired (as all exchange students are) they gave me the name Almos, which means sleepy, but it also is a name of the first chief of the Hungarian tribes from Siberia. So, from now on I am Almos.

Spain. That’s right. I went to Spain. It was amazing. Well, the places were amazing, but the timing was terrible. It rained all the time when we were there and I went to bed at like 1 every night, because that’s the time we usually got back to the hotels and we had to wake up at 5:30 every morning. I was not a happy camper, and I must say we could have had a much better tour guide, she was a little too demanding that we all wake up at 5:30 yet we never left the hotel until 8. Why? I have no idea. Besides that, I had a great time. I went to the Casino in Monte-Carlo, when we were driving through. We also went to Cannes, which reminded me of Miami, ahh home. Then came my favorite city on the entire trip. BARCELONA!!! Beautiful, rich, sunny, always great weather and a sight to see. However, we only stayed in the city for a day, until we drove through Valencia, saw the market, which is a World heritage site, and took off to Sevilla. Wow! I never thought that I would have that much fun. I ate all day, I mean I had 6 meals, then I pedaled a boat on the Guadalquivir, the river in the city, and finally went to the bull fighting rings. I was supposed to go that day to Africa, but my visa wouldn’t allow it. However that didn’t matter, I still had a great time. After that, the next day we went to the last Moorish stronghold in Spain, THE ALHAMBRA!! I’ve never seen something so large and so beautiful. Also, I’ve never been in such cold weather. It's the South of Spain for Pete’s sake, why is it so cold? Returning back to Hungary was not a pleasant trip. I was on a bus for two days, and I didn’t sleep for Two DAYS! Do you know how crazy I went? I started throwing cheese on the bus at other people while they were sleeping. I lost it. Plus, I didn’t eat for two days, ok I had some snacks on the bus, but I wanted to have an actual meal, not chips and cookies. I want FOOD! Then after the bus ride through hell I arrived home and found myself back in the safety of my host home, which really feels like my own home. I didn’t really realize how much I loved my host family until I was away from them on the trip.

I’m back in Budapest now and the weather is not………Florida. So I had to buy some clothes for winter, somehow I didn’t think that winter would actually come. Everyone tells me that I must live under a rock if I’ve never seen snow. Uh, it’s called Florida, thank you. I wear a sweater, long socks, scarf and sometimes some gloves, and it hasn’t even snowed yet. I’m still waiting for the snow.

On language. Here’s where the cultural part comes in, Hungarian is not even closely related to the languages around it. Now you may be saying, “OK, so it’s evolved a little differently than its neighbors have, other languages do too.” If you’re saying that let me give you a little history lesson. English and Hindi are more closely related than Hungarian and Slovakian, which is right across the river. This is because, if you look at the languages in Europe 1200 years ago, Hungarian was not there. All the ancestors of present Indo-European languages were here, Latin, Old German, Old English, Greek, different forms of the Nordic and Slavic languages, etc. Hungarian was not there because Hungarian is related to few languages on Earth. No one knows for sure where Hungarians came from, but many believe it was somewhere East of the Ural mountains around the Altaic mountains in Western China (However Caucasian). That’s right, in China. Anyway, Hungarians were supposedly driven out of their homeland by other peoples and thus forced to migrate, when they began to they never stopped. So, they moved over 8000 miles (roughly) to the Carpathian basin (Hungary) in the 800’s but before that they split off into different groups around 4000 years ago, from what the very shady timeline says, and this group went into northern Europe and within the last millennium split into two languages; Estonian and Finnish. After several thousand years these languages have almost nothing in common with one another. Not to mention, somehow the tribal Hungarians before I was even born or you for that matter knew that I was coming. Here’s what happened: the 7 Hungarian tribes gathered around a campfire and said “One day, a boy named Drake Starling will try to learn our language we must make it as impossible for him as possible! Quickly! Arpad, start making some irregular verbs! Almos, make every verb have several conjugations in each tense for each person and give no proper order to them, so that even our own people will not be able to tell the difference. YOU THERE! Peasant man, put all prepositions at the end of words and make all nouns have irregular endings if they are one syllable words." If you knew some Hungarian it would be really funny to you.

So far, I think that’s all about it.

Still waiting for snow…..

-Drake